It can be easy to take things personally in life, especially when it comes to matters that are close to our hearts. Whether it’s a comment made by a friend, a thoughtless act by a coworker, or even an insensitive remark from a stranger, it can be hard to shake off the feelings of hurt and frustration that come with it. Fortunately, there are ways to break the cycle of taking things personally and turning these experiences into opportunities to grow.
By learning to recognize and distance ourselves from personal triggers, we can gain the clarity needed to understand the root of the issue without letting it affect our emotional well-being. By developing a healthier mindset, we can also start to live more authentically and open ourselves up to more meaningful experiences.
Breaking the cycle of taking things personally is a journey of self-discovery and growth, and it starts with one simple step.
Identify Your Personal Triggers
Before you can break the cycle of taking things personally, it’s important first to understand what sets off these feelings. For each person, this can be different and may stem from a variety of sources.
Some common triggers include:
- Feelings of shame or guilt
- A sense of general inadequacy
- A desire for perfectionism
- An inability to accept compliments
An inability to let go of past mistakes Try to be mindful of your emotional triggers as they happen so you can have a better idea of where they’re stemming from. If you find yourself taking things too personally, try to take a step back and reevaluate the situation. Are there any personal triggers at play here?
Develop a Healthy Mindset
An unhealthy mindset can be a major trigger for taking things too personally. This can include stressing over things you have no control over or otherwise blowing situations out of proportion. Rather than accepting the situation for what it is, you might magnify it and let it cloud your perspective.
While this can happen with just about anything in life, it’s particularly common during times of high stress or with issues that are close to our hearts. If you find yourself dealing with a situation that is bringing out your unhealthy mindset, try to bring things back down to reality. Remember that you have no control over the actions of others and what’s done is done.
Practice Self-Care
Taking care of your physical and mental well-being is an important part of preventing feelings of being too personally affected by situations. If you notice your emotions are being triggered by a situation that doesn’t warrant such feelings, you can use this as a sign to take some time to practice self-care. Some helpful ways to take care of yourself during times of stress include:
- Practicing mindfulness
- Practicing self-compassion
- Exercising
- Eating a healthy diet
Practicing self-forgiveness Taking care of yourself when you feel the need to do so doesn’t make you selfish, it shows you are wise enough to know when you are at risk of becoming overwhelmed.
Learn to Let Go
Sometimes the best way to break the cycle of taking things personally is to let go of the things that trigger you simply. Whether it’s an emotion, a regret, or an unhealthy mindset, letting go can help put the situation into perspective without the added weight of personal guilt or shame. Remember that you are in control of how you choose to view each situation in life.
Whether or not someone is sensitive enough to apologize, whether or not you get the promotion you were hoping for, whether or not a friend comes through for you when you need them – these are not things we can control. We can, however, control how we react to these situations.
Let go of the things that trigger you and put them into a new perspective. You will free yourself from the unnecessary burden of guilt and shame and open yourself up to a new way of viewing events in your life.
Live More Authentically
Taking things personally can make it hard to express yourself to others. If something triggers you and you’re not fully aware of why you feel this way, you may be hesitant to speak up and express yourself. If you’re not sure what you’re feeling, you can’t expect others to understand what you’re going through.
By taking things less personally and learning to recognize your triggers, you can feel more comfortable letting others know what you’re going through. This allows you to build authentic relationships with others. It also helps to prevent you from taking on too much emotional responsibility for others because you can better identify what you’re feeling and why.
Moving Forward
Breaking the cycle of taking things personally is a lifelong journey. It’s important to remember that no matter how much you’ve grown, there will always be times when you slip back into old habits. When you notice this happening, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, use it as a reminder to go back to the basics of what you’ve learned and recommit to bettering yourself. There is no finish line when it comes to personal growth. The second you think you’ve arrived, that’s when you know it’s time to keep moving forward.